I'm on Morning Shift

Woah! It's been a while since I last posted, but things have been full of events since then. I gave birth to my beautiful second son on October 2nd, 2012. Hayden Elijah Colton :) My genes dominate because once again, this baby looks just like me and that makes me happy. Here is a picture for you all to see. He is a big baby actually and I got to watch the surgery from the reflexion on the light. I saw my insides!! lol

The day after I had him, our house got robbed. They took all of mine and Kate's stuff but left other things, oh and they stole some movies from Skyler and his favorite comfort blanket. Bastards, you can steal from me, but why cross the line and take from my son? So we came home to a wrecked house, everything was gone through and various items missing. Bye Bye Xbox, Wii, Playstation II, Gamecube, all my games, over half of my movie collection (all my Angelina Jolie movies are gone! I almost had all of them and they took a whole dvd tower) My laptop that only worked sometimes, old cell phones, they took our Venus Razors that weren't opened and an unopened dove deodorant, all of Kate's pants, including the Candy Pants I bought her from Britney Spears Line, a picture frame that was $20...ugh, and just other stupid stuff really. Well someone must like us enough to want our stuff. I just regret not being there because it would have been on! It has always been my dream to find a intruder in my haus :) They wouldn't leave conscious hehe.

Anyway, so Hayden is doing well. Skyler is more and more interested in his brother..as he calls him "Bubba." Skyler seems like he has grown in the past month. He is about 3 feet tall and 30 lbs now. He doesn't look like a 20 month old. He is starting to talk more, and tunes us out when we talk to him. He does his own thing but is very loving. Right now he is sick, so he always wants held and nurtured. I love him. Him and Kate have been spending alot of time together because he doesn't leave her side. I'm up with Hayden during the nights and early mornings. I try to let Kate sleep because she is go go go during the day. She let me sleep for like 5 hours yesterday. I want exhausted and don't remember passing out like that. That seems to happen a lot lately. Me laying down and passing out after a long day. I woke up at 5:35am yesterday, got all my school work done, and just chilled. I have this weekend off so I want to spend time with my family. Kate and I don't really get much time together. One of us is always sleepy, and dealing with one of our kids. It's a new time and we expected this, but at least we have eachother :) I'm trying not to let the stress get the best of me, or us, but sometimes its hard. All we can do is try. I love my life, and this year is ending well.

1 Day Away.. OMG

Ello,

Its hard to believe that tomorrow is the day the birthing process will start. Things are happening quickly indeed! Yesterday was the last day of my seminars for this quarter at Kaplan. Right now my grades are still at a 4.0 average so I should be good if I keep up the work :) I'm going to try to get as much of it done today as possible because I don't know what the weekend will bring. I am in need of a flash drive though in case I need to work on my studies at the hospital, on the laptop. All my work is saved on my desktop computer, and I lost my other flashdrives I was using.

Well yesterday went by quickly for the most part. I stayed up and played the Sims 2, and am finished with Kate's daddy, so I'm working on my mom now. Went to bed around 8, and was in a sleep daze until 11. Kate made us fried egg sandwiches on bagels for breakfast and some coffee :). Skyler was dancing on the coffee table again and everytime I closed my eyes on the couch, he ran up with the feather duster and tickled my face lol. Kate and I spent most of the day in bed watching TV, which is rare because we don't do that lol. Skyler played in his room and in our room all day. I got comfy and me and Kate took a nap after Skyler fell Asleep. It was great! We slept in until 630 or so. I made us Ravioli before my class started at 7pm. It was fast and only lasted until 7:30, so we watched the X Factor for a bit. I decided to take a shower with Skyler to help him go to bed.. It relaxed him, but he was still wide awake!! We came upstairs and played until my 10pm class, and he still was awake running around and climbing out of his bed when we were trying to put him to sleep. Kate tried rocking him to sleep but he still didn't fall asleep. We finally decided to lay him down and let him fuss his way to sleep.. It eventually worked. I called my mom and talked to her until my phone died. We ate some chicken and noodles, and Kate took a shower. She came back up and I gave her a massage to help her sleep, then I laid down, she grabbed me and the next thing I know..we were asleep :) It was a easy day, and I feel restored. Today we are going to clean our haus some more to prepare for the unknown. Leah may be staying the weekend, depending  on how things go with me, so we are giving her our room to snooze in, since she is pregnant and its the best place to be :) Well I'm going to start simming again. Thanks for reading!

<3 Randi

I Slept My Day Away

Hello!

Man, today I was worn the **** out! I didn't really sleep because I was too uncomfortable, so by 10:00am, I had to do something, so I tried to fall asleep..and I did. Kate let me sleep in and took care of Skyler and made sure he didn't wake me up. She is so sweet to me. I woke up around 1pm for some Ramen noodles and PB&J Samich hehe, then I went back to sleep. I was completely exhausted, and I can see why. Sleeping for only 2-3 hours at a time for five days or so does take a toll on one's body. I woke up closer to 5pm finally after recovering with sleep. My body felt way better than it did, and I was ready for my day. Kate was at her sister's house and Skyler was just waking up from his nap too. As soon as I woke up, my woman came home to me :). I went downstairs and started cooking us dinner. She wanted some homemade pizza, so I started making the dough. We had pepperoni and cheese pizza..it was delicious! We ate, then decided to go on a walk to try and hurry this birthing process up, and to spend time together since I didn't get to see her most of the day. We both were curious what my blood pressure was, so we decided to take a walk to CVS and let me check it there. It was so nice outside, and the sky was hazy. I enjoy our walks because its just me, her and our baby boy. Gives us time to talk and focus on eachother. We made it there and my blood pressure was perfect! 123/73. Amazing for walking there, sitting down, and voila! We then walked home. Skyler didn't fall asleep, and enjoyed looking around, but it made him tired. When we got in the neighborhood a dog was barking and Kate was like "shut up" and Skyler was starting to say "shut up" too. lol it was cute. He is more talkative these days. He must know something is going to happen soon, because he is all over me, and wanting all of my attention, more than usual. Walking slow wears you out more than brisk walking I think. Kate and I were worn out when we got home. We made some strawberry koolaid, and downed it, but Skyler to bed, then relaxed for a bit. I made us some popcorn and Kate made us some cheesecake lol. We watched the news, then TMZ, I rubbed her back and she fell asleep. I've been playing the Sims 2 and skyler just woke up from a bad dream..so I must go. I love you Kate, Sky and Baby Hayden!

I like this cooking thing :)

I've decided that I enjoy cooking. If I had it my way I would cook every meal from virtually scratch. I used to loath it, but after I have been doing it and researching how to be better, it has became a hobby. This morning I cooked us biscuits and gravy and it was the bomb! I ate some chicken/broccoli alfredo that Brian made at work just because it sounded good. For supper, I made us hamburgers on toasted bread..and damn! It almost tasted like a frisco melt from Steak and Shake. Pretty badass I must say :)

Here is how my day went..

I stayed up for a while and played the Sims 2. I deleted everything and recreated Brian as my first sim (Brian is my father for those of you who do not know). I will create Kate's dad next then our mom's and so on and so on.. Here is a picture lol

Brian talking to the Genie the gypsy left at his door..

I stayed up until Skyler woke up around 8:00AM, I fed him some blueberry Pomegranate applesauce and some cheese poof things from Parents Choice, put "Despicable Me" in for him, then came back into our room. Kate was awake kinda and asked when I was coming back to bed, I couldn't resist, so I crawled back in bed and got all snuggly. We slept in until 11 or so, Skyler fell back asleep, and I woke up to Kate finding the letter I wrote her in the origami heart <3. She woke up in a great mood hehe. I laid there for a little longer, then got up because Hayden started kicking me, and I made us biscuits and gravy. I played the Sims a little more, while Kate watched Steve Wilkos, then we laid down again lol. She stayed up and did this and that. I woke up because the baby was in my ribs and it was hard to breathe. Kate got me hooked on playing "Song Pop" on Facebook, so we battled eachother for a while, then ate some Chicken/Broccoli Alfredo. I fell back asleep again, and she watched TV. Her sister ended up showing up with her boyfriend and a few friends, so Kate went down to say hey. They left, I cooked dinner, we cleaned, gave Skyler a bath, moved the bassinet upstairs by our bed..and they both fell asleep. Today was another lazy day, but I was so tired... I'm glad I have a few days left because I've been draggin'. Well I'm going to go back to playing my game, just thought I would record my daily events :) I love you Kate, Sky and Hayden <3 R

4 Days

Its hard to imagine that in four days, I will have my appointment with Dr. Copeland and most likely will be admitted into the hospital to deliver Hayden. This will be my last four days being able to feel him inside my body and have this pregnant feeling. It has been a long year of pregnancy, so think that I got pregnant on January 4th, 2012, found out I was actually pregnant on February 12th, and went through two seasons to get here. It feels like a long time, and Kate and I are so ready to meet the new addition to our family. I'm not looking forward to the recovery stage if I have to have a C-Section (which is the most likely outcome because I have a vertical cut incision, and will have more risk of a rupture during natural birth). My last appointment in June, my doctor said that this baby is big for its age and if he kept growing at that same weight I would have a 9 pound baby, and he recommended a C-Section. Its all going to be new in a way, considering I was knocked out when Skyler was born, and it felt like I went to sleep, woke up and there was a baby lol. I'm not a fan of Epidurals and I want to avoid getting one at all costs. Something about having a needle go into my spinal fluid isn't natural to me, and 90% of every woman I've talked to who has had one, has told me they now have back issues of some sort. Right now I am free of any back pain, but I don't know if its from my constant yoga practice which is supposed to make back pain go away for the most part. I don't know. The last time I had a back ache was when I was pregnant with Skyler. Only time will tell how this situation will unfold for me. I just hope all is well, and I have a happy, healthy baby, and I make it out great as well. I'm very fortunate to have people in my life who will be there to help out. Leah is going to stay the night Thursday and watch Sky when we go to the doctor, and is going to help out in taking care of him while Kate and I are in the hospital. If she needs a break, then we have Kate's family who are ready and wanting to keep him at their place as well. So we are covered. Its exciting how life will be changing soon :).

Anyway..

Today has been an easy going day. I slept in actually until 10am, and Skyler was at his gate yelling at one of us to wake up, so I got up and let Kate sleep in. We went downstairs, and I let him run around and be a toddler, while I cooked some French Toast from scratch. Its interesting how the more practice one gets at cooking, the faster and easier it becomes hehe. Skyler ate some pomegranates and made faces at himself in the mirror while I cooked. We then brought up the food and had Kate wake up to some hot and fresh breakfast. We ate, and decided to lay back down. We figured it was Sunday so why rush into the day. Well we had to be in Chesterfield around 2:30pm, but ended up sleeping in until 1:40..so woke up in a rush and got us all ready, then we left. The part that makes us both fall deeply asleep fast and regardless of the situation, is when I wrap my arms around Kate and we get all cozy...works every time. Its different these days because Hayden creates that big gap between my body and her body lol, and most of the time he is kicking her..but we manage to make it work. For the first time ever, Kyle and Leah beat us there! I brought Skyler's baby gate to block him from the stairs, and it actually was a great idea, we didn't have to keep chasing him around that corner. He was a good baby, but was harassing the plants this time. I got to catch up with Leah because we haven't seen or talked to eachother in a week. Her baby is growing, and I'm glad she is doing well, my brother seems to be treating her well lol. We had meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green beans and a dinner roll. Also, some fresh grapes he grew from his garden, and Skyler loved them. I did dishes, and Kyle helped. Kate, Brian, my Uncle Keith, and Grandpa all sat around and watch the Colts lose, and of course NASCAR. I took Sky outside to let out some energy, and then we decided to head out after it was official that the Colts lost. haha. Kate got us some Ice cream cones from McDonalds on the way home, and Skyler some fries..then I wanted a Cappuchino..so I got spoiled and she got me one. lol, she spoils me these days and I never go without a craving. I came home, and she and Sky went to see her sister at her dad's house. I just relaxed, then laid down for a nap until she came home. I woke up to her kissing me :) I love my woman, she is great. I was still a bit tired, so she gave Skyler a bath and let me sleep in a little more, she wrote me a letter :).. We then decided it was time to make supper, so we went to Payless and got...

• Lettuce
• Tomato
• Beef
• Taco Seasoning
• Tortillas
• Sour Cream
• Milk for Sky
• Sausage (for breakfast)
• Biscuits (for breakfast- I'm going to make Biscuits and Gravy lol)

All for under $13.. amazing..

She cleaned up and I cooked dinner, we ate, she tried to put Skyler to bed, but he climbed out of his bed, and played a little more, until I put him back to bed. Kate took her a hot bath and I did the dishes. Skyler was whining, and I think just needed his mom-om (as he calls Kate) to tuck him in and give him that good night kiss, just like every night. The next thing I know, he is asleep, and I'm crawling into bed next to my lavender smelling fiance. We fell asleep very fast. I'm awake now because this baby doesn't let me sleep very long periods at a time. I probably sleep 3-4 hours at a time, but have the most vivid dreams... Well that's my review of my day. It's 2:18AM, and I think I'm going to play The Sims 2. Peace Out!

Randi

Randi's September 2012 Playlist (playlist)

Baked Stuffed Jalapenos

A few days ago I decided to use up the five jalapenos Kate and I had left in our refrigerator, so I made us some baked stuffed Jalapenos. My mom made them for me before a few years back, but she wrapped hers in bacon, and they were good. Here is a picture of my creation..

Baked  Stuffed Jalapenos

• 5 Jalapeno peppers (Large)
• 1/4 cup minced onion
• 1 8oz package of cream cheese, softened (I used Great Value)
• 1 1/2 teaspoon cumin
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup Sharp Cheddar shredded cheese
• 1/4 cup bacon bits
• 1 teaspoon dried oregano

1. Preheat oven to 375 Degrees F (our oven doesn't work so I baked mine in a toaster oven)
2. Slice each Jalapeno in half long way into two separate pieces to resemble a boat. 
3. Scape out the seeds and ribs from each jalapeno. (I used a grapefruit spoon)
4. Mix together all the ingredients in a bowl.
5. Start filling each pepper with the filling. Arrange the peppers on a foil-lined baking sheet and bake for 20 Minutes, or until the cheese is bubbly and lightly browned, and the peppers are cooked.
6. Allow 5 minutes to cool before you serve.

**I used this website as inspiration, but tweaked it to my liking **

**I also had a little extra filling, and it actually was a good dip :)**

Its getting chilly outside

I absolutely love this picture of me and Kate. I am genuinely smiling, and so is she :). We look like parents too.

Today is my 8th week in my classes with Kaplan (second quarter I'm in) I am still maintaining my 4.0 goal. I don't know what it is but I'm motivated taking them online and doing my best. Online classes work  well for me, and I actually get excited about them. I woke up around 9am today to the neighbors dog barking non-stop, then decided to make coffee, shortly after Skyler woke up to a soaking wet diaper, so I got him some milk and let him play.Right now I'm eating white rice with fresh tomato's and soy sauce. Its yummy!

Time has been flying by since my last day of work. I feel Hayden lower and lower by the day. Yesterday I was soo drained, I rested most of my day away. I felt bad for Kate because I haven't been giving her much attention the past few days. Today I will do something nice for her to remind her how much she means to me :). I love you Kate. It got down to 30 something degrees last night, and you can feel it too

Out with the Negativity

Hello readers!

So this is what I posted to my Facebook earlier today. What happened was I went to my "friend" Luke's page to see pictures of him and his new son, but when I clicked on his folder, I found this of my brother. So I took this screen shot after commenting on it, and posted it on my Facebook, tagged my brother in it, and then the comments started with Kyle, and with Leah (my other "friend"). I thought it was fair to my brother to know that his name and picture was out there in a negative way so I showed him. Of course this didn't sit well with the other parties involved. I mean what do they expect from me? Me to be like, oh cool feel free to talk shit about my brother, and I'll just stay out of it. I admit I usually do, but this just really pissed me off. The whole situation of Kyle dating Leah for years, them breaking up, her deciding to have a baby with a guy just to have a baby because Kyle doesn't want kids right now and she does, then dating this guy who used to be a good friend of mine, getting pregnant, breaking up with him for my brother then finding out she was pregnant. She got herself in the hole, and I have to read all of it. The war between Luke being jealous of Kyle, Leah being upset about Luke and blah blah blah. I tried explaining my views about it, but they got offended. Leah was like, "why do you have to drag my name in the dirt and give me a bad name?" Well who else would possibly tell Luke that Kyle beats women? Hmm? After all we lived with both of you and I know he doesn't beat woman, if he did then I would beat his ass, and we weren't raised that way. I got tired of it, and deleted her and Luke. I don't need their negativity in my life, and I'm tired of reading all the drama between them. I don't even hang out with Luke anymore, and Leah doesn't come around either, so whatever. I choose to stick up for Kyle because he isn't a bad person and is my only sibling. I'm just trying to change my ways. I know I haven't been the best person out there, and now is the time to be better.

Well other than that today has been a good day. Kate took me to see Resident Evil Retribution :) I was waiting forever to see it and omg it was amazing!! Thank you baby for taking me, I love you forever. I recommend watching it in 3D because its the only way. Tina and John watched Skyler for us when we went to see it. I admit, I worry about him when he is with anyone else because if something were to happen, its not like he can tell us. I just don't trust people, I'm protective of my family, but it was nice to get out and do something. Kate and I won't be able to for a while after Hayden comes. We decided to name him Hayden Elijah Colton Alfrey. My mom likes the name Colton, so we decided to replace it from Hunter to Colton, just for her. 

Kate is celebrating her sisters birthday right now downstairs. They brought over some beer to drink in celebration. Alcohol doesn't sound appealing at all to me. Even after I am able to drink alcohol again, I don't think I want to. Looking back at the past, its always caused problems for me. I am not myself and I make stupid decisions when I get tipsy, and I hurt Kate by my actions sometimes. I'm not that person, and I don't want to drink again. Its not me, I've matured and have no reason to put poison in my body. I want to live my life and remember it free and clear :). Both of my parents drank and I didn't like it when I was little because they became people I didn't know, and fought and stuff. I don't want Skyler and Hayden to ever witness anything that will make them think different of me. I think really I'm just done dealing with things I don't have to deal with. It makes me happy how I can choose what to leave in my life and what not to. I'm going to try and do things because I want to, not because I have to or feel obligated to. I know I'm changing as a person, and outgrowing things, people, and habits. Its a nice thing. Being a second time mother makes me realize things, and how much responsibility I have in my life. All I want is to be happy and make my family happy, and healthy. If there is something or someone who disrupts that, then they will be gone out of our lives. Everyone gets their chance to be a part of my amazing life, and if they disrespect us, then its their loss. :) thanks for reading!

Randi Alfrey

Cleaning Out Clutter in my Computer

Hello,

Right now I am uploading all of the saved pictures on my computer to my Photo bucket account. I realize that I only have most pictures saved on my computer and if something were to happen to my computer (such as a crash) then all of my precious pictures would be lost!! It gives me ease of mind to do it, so I'm happy. I'll leave a link to it on here later for you. I am also trying to free up some memory because I have a lot of things on this desktop computer, and no extra funds to get an external hard drive.

Anyway, on to other news :). Today was my first day of maternity leave from United Faith Housing. I really enjoyed the free time to spend with my family. When I say my family I am referring to my beautiful fiance' Kate, and our baby boy Skyler. I don't get to spend time with any other family members, so this is my family. We are very excited for Hayden Hunter Elijah to be here. I'm due in three weeks (on September 30th). Oh my gosh I feel so weighed down. He is pushing my stomach out so much, in all directions. I will feel so empty and light when I have him lol. We have everything we need if he were to come early, so that's good. Today we both slept in, I read some of my P90X nutrition guide, drank some tea, cleaned house with Kate, ate lunch, took a great nap, spent time with Skyler in his room, and cleaned up some more. Kate bought me an auxiliary cable for the computer so we can have the desktop upstairs again without it being in our old room. Thanks baby, you are appreciated.

I am researching my after pregnancy life right now while I can. I want to become fit and healthy again, and not keep on any of this baby weight. Having to babies in a period of three years has to take a toll on my body and I want to have a healthy image and body weight as soon as I can. I've decided to try P90X, so I have the video's, and am researching it as much as I can. I am also going to create a workout blog to track my progress and give myself motivation. I simply want to be the best me I can be. I am 25 years old, work, go to college and I have mouths to feed and a family to support. I cannot afford to be any less than my personal best. I want to be healthy and live a long life so I can enjoy all the future memories to come. I love life to much to not give it a good shot.

Well I'm going to explore more of blogger and what I can do. Thanks for reading my thoughts :)

Randi Alfrey

Here is the link to my photo bucket account

The time is approaching

I have exactly one month left before Hayden is expected to be here. To be honest, I don't know how much bigger I can get, and my body is extremely uncomfortable. All the extra weight is starting to take a toll on my body, especially when I try to sleep. My hip bones become sore if I lay on one side too long. I constantly feel movement and I'm exciting to meet this special new person soon. Things have been a little stressful lately. We didn't know if we were going to be able to keep our van from JD Byrider, because I go on leave September 7th from work. Since I'm the only one making enough to make the car payments, it was starting to scare us, because if I break contract then my credit is fucked! I'll be charged the remaining balance left on the car which of right now is about 11, 700 something. Kate donates but that is what keeps us going through the week and not enough to make the 180 car payment biweekly. My mom says she will help us out until I get back to work, so I hope all goes well, but I'm ready for the worst if so. Kate is stressing out about our finances and feels like everything will be on her shoulders once I go on leave, which it will be pretty much. All we can do is keep positive and keep trying. I'm exciting to get my body back, so I can start working out again and get feeling good. I miss doing yoga as much as I used to, and getting that workout high. I plan on doing P90X when I can get back to that level. Its all exciting, and I am hopeful. Well thanks for reading.

Randi Alfrey

I have evolved

I used to sit around and worry when it came to things I really had no control over. Now I realize that was a waste of time and effort. If something is going to happen or is meant to happen, it will happen, no matter if I try to prevent it, no matter if I do everything in my nature to control the situation. Life will happen. I was realizing this when Kate was getting ready to go hang out with Kalynn. She was happy to leave and go hang out, I told her she could, and I would stay home and work on my homework and do some laundry. That is what I planned on doing today before work anyway. Kate needs to get out of the haus, and hang out with other people besides me and Skyler all the time. Soon we will have another baby, so she should go out and have fun while she can. A newborn baby takes work and attention. It doesn't bother me that she is going to hang out with her ex-girlfriend. It wasn't that deep in the first place. It actually wouldn't bother me if she were to go hang out with Jessica Lamb either. I am to the point where I know she is happy, satisfied and not going anywhere because she has a family and I do my best to keep her happy. If she wants to leave, she knows she can. All I can do is give her my all and hope its enough to keep her. I'm past the clinginess and jealousy we struggled with in the past. I'm happy it doesn't bother me and she is enjoying her friends. I like spending time with myself and Skyler. All my time goes to work lately and school, and its nice just to chill these days. I feel older and more mature, and it makes me happy. Being a mommy is great and I am happy with my love.

 

Randi

Beware of Johnny Miller

I am officially a college student again :) I'm going for my Associates Degree in Information Technology at Kaplan University Online. I already have the design part of it, so I want to explore the technical side now. I'm excited and start on May 16th, 2012!! I'm putting this puzzle to life together at a great pace I must say. I seen this sexy ass Macbook Air that I may be investing in..omg It made me all tingly inside lol. Perhaps I should put that on my to do list. Anyway, today is my day off and Kate and Sky and I are going to go to the park when she gets back from donating plasma. It would be nice to do some yoga outside. I hope Kate will want to try it sometime in the future :) I am half expecting to be called in at 4 to work, since I usually do get called in on my days off.. Skyler is walking around more and more, he is slowly getting that courage. I'm proud of you son. He is getting soo tall these days..


So Leah moved out to her mom's so its just me, Kate, Sky and Brian here now, and Jeff during the morning..its strange but quiet I guess. She came by and took Amata to her new home yesterday, so good luck guys!


Ugh, so Kate and I have the same problem we have had since I met this Johnny Miller guy four years ago. He never gives up and is like that annoying little boy in your neighborhood who comes over every day to see if you will play, and doesn't want to leave for anything. He texts me all the time even after avoiding him for weeks, then yesterday I told him me and Kate switched phones and to leave us alone, then he starts talking all this sexual shit to "her" saying blah blah blah, and says just let me come over, Randi is at work, no one will ever know. He is fucking manic! Who does that? Desperate, sick men? He is like over 30 and has always been doing this to both of us. We were friends with Ashley- his girlfriend, but she never believes he would ever do these things to her.. So we stay away because we don't deserve this harassment. He is always trying to get either Kate or Me alone and talk all this stuff. He has done things that make me want to beat him up, or castrate him just so he will stay away from us. He randomly stops by our house, follows us in our car to just talk to us, and spams us with his texts if we ignore him. He thinks just because he works at a prison, he is okay to do these things. One day he will have it coming to him. Johnny you are a sicko!


That man is sickening... 


Well anyways, I'm off here :) Have a great day and namaste
<3 Kate
<3 Skyler
<3 New Baby (Kaitlin Shea or Maxim Shayne)

My views on my family, and ugh..Cassie

Its official, I do believe that Skyler has gotten my sick. He has an ear infection and upper respiratory infection..and its almost always guaranteed that I'll get sick when he does, but its impossible to stay away from a sick baby, so It always happens. I try to take my vitamins everyday, and drink lots of warm drinks..but i'm not immune lol. Well here is how my day went..


Kate and I slept in and went to bed early last night. We didn't quite wake up until around 1:30pm. She got Skyler ready, and was having bad dreams about me leaving her for another girl again. I hate it when she has those dreams about me..I wonder when or if they will ever stop, because they put her in a bad mood. The haus is dirty downstairs..dishes piled, dirty laundry, the trash was overflowing, kitty litter needs changed. I don't get it.. Me, Kate, Skyler, Brian, Leah and Jeff all live in this same haus..that is five capable adults.. I work and also am pregnant.. I do what I can but I get so worn out, so my main duty is laundry. Jeff takes the trash out but only if you ask him...Leah...claims she never had to clean growing up and isn't going to start now, so that's a lost cause. Its just fucked. She lives here too, yes she may not dirty much dishes, and she usually does her own laundry, but you would think she can at least help out because she lives here rent free. She is still a child, but its no excuse..if she ever wants to grow up she needs to learn the responsibility of doing chores just like everybody else. I had to do them my whole life. Jeff is barely here, he sleeps, showers, goes to work, does his own laundry..but still a little more help would be appreciated. Brian never cleaned only if it is bad..he doesn't clean his own room. So idk whats going on there. Kate is left to clean everything, and thats not right. This is why we do well living alone, because we are clean people who like a clean haus.. we work well together. It isn't fair to us or Skyler to live like this, which is why we want to move out.. It will happen when I can afford it. Anyway, we go to Chesterfield to eat lunch with our Grandpa and Keith, we eat salad and spaghetti. I watch baseball most of the time, and Kyle starts doing dishes...then we find Leah helping him with dishes.. So Kate goes up and asks if she will help her dry the dishes at our haus, and she says no. That's a fucked up situation.. What because you have witnesses that you are doing them...is the only reason you do it? Or because of Kyle? I don't know but that was rude, you should know better. A little help around your own haus shouldn't be a problem. Kate always gets treated unfairly, by everyone it seems. No one understands her or knows how to react to her. She is a good hearted person and doesn't deserve the shit she takes from people especially her sister and family in general. I notice how everyone turns against her when we did break up. They claim they didn't like how she treated me and I deserved better, but they never took the time to get to know her. She just doesn't take peoples shit and then says something when they do something do bother her. I take her side 100% though. So we took our dvd's back to Family Video, then went to still Chillin' so I could check out the tattoo supplies. They didn't have much, I talked to the owner and he gave me a free grip, then we left. Came home, started watching Hulu, and I played Animal Crossing and started Laundry..Skyler took a few steps with our help and was overly excited :) He is cute. Now he is asleep and Kate went to hang out with Cassie and Kalynn. I don't like it but that is her sister and her ex girlfriend..I would think it would be awkward..but I guess it isn't. I can't stand Cassie, don't want to be around her and I only put up with her for Kate. It never was like this. She was alright in the beginning, then her and her girlfriend at the time started coming over to our haus and stealing from us, then I punched her girlfriend in the face, but the funny thing was I was going to go for Cassie, but ended up hitting Crystal. Anyway after that she disowned Kate for three years..this happened in 2007, so in 2010 Cassie came back into Kates life after her and Crystal broke up. I was against it, but Kate figured she owed it to Cassie because they are sisters..anyways, at that time Cassie was dating this and that girl and this and that guy, found more trouble and then I don't know they fought and such...this goes on all the time. Cassie moved in with Kate's "dad" John for a while and I don't know really I didn't pay attention. Even so we always helped her out, gave her rides and stuff..then she eventually got with this girl Bobbi...they were together for 2011 pretty much, and Cassie disappeared again out of Kate's life, then me and Kate had our separation, then she spent alot of time with Cassie. Then kate and I got back together and here we are. Cassie was homeless, we took her in and she screwed us on the payments she promised to pay, then was never here, pretty much used us as storage, then found another girl to mooch off...Kalynn...which was Kate's ex but just for like three days, but still.. Cassie always dates Kate's ex's..which is just wrong in the book of morals. I would never do that to my brother and we aren't even close. Then she went back to being all about her woman and never spending time with her sister and treating her like shit, so I told Kate I was done supporting her involvement with Cassie. She may be her sister, but family members don't treat family members like that. All she is good for is drama and causing problems.. Our son shouldn't be around her nor Kate..but that's my opinion. I do admit Kate was happy during the three years they didn't see each other, didn't miss Cassie or even bring her up..she didn't care. That's how you know the bridge is burned and there is nothing left. Blood doesn't mean anything to me, just because someone is blood and treats you like shit and has no respect for you, doesn't mean you have to still be fair or even let them in your life.. once we up and move away, I know we won't have to deal with anyone's shit, her family or even mine. My family doesn't have much involvement with me or my family so I know I won't be missed and that's me being honest. I do envy some people who have mothers who are there or overbearing sometimes, or have a dad who is overprotective. I know my life would be alot different and I would have avoided alot of mistakes if I had someone dependable to talk to me or steer me in the right direction growing up. Dealing with puberty alone with no mother and a father who didn't care..was tough..so I self taught myself..I see how no supervision affects a child.. Kids need that discipline. But my parents were addicted to things and they always seemed to put their needs in front of ours, I never felt like I had a stable home, or stable caregivers, I just always felt like I only had myself to take care of me and Kyle...but it all did change once I met Kate :) She was the first person to tell me no lol. I needed it because when she met me I didn't care..I only cared about myself and my job, and now I can't live without her. She has been the only stable woman in my life since my mother left me when I was 13... so I went 6 years being around guys, Brian, Kyle and all of his friends. I told Skyler the other day...you know I know I am your mother, but I have no real idea how to be one, I mean I know what I would want a mother to be like to me, and what one should do...so I'll try. I'm better equipped to be a father, lol. Ah the conversations I have with him are interesting. Watching movies and tv always make me wonder how it would be like to have a brother who actually wants to do things with me, or a father that would like to do things..and a mother that is there to talk to.. I don't know any of them, and when I did try...they showed no interest or blew me off, so I gave up on them last year. It may be wrong to give up on your family, but I've been trying for 25 years and If that isn't devotion then I don't know. I think Brian just wants me to get out on my own so he can enjoy his last years...I mean my little brother lives on his own. I've tried and tried but things happened.. so I am here and it makes me feel horrible honestly. My mother lives states away and does her own thing and has been living kid free for 11 years now..I call that abandonment..but she seems happy there with her own family. I can't wait to leave this nest that is falling apart and full of bad memories..I'll never come back here... 


Well I've been rambling lol. I'm going to go make some tea and check on the laundry. Kate I love you soo much and I hope you know and feel that everyday :) Skyler thank you for making me a better person, I love you. And New baby who decided not to show us what you are yet..I love you too and thanks for being here and wanting to join our little family :)

My thoughts of today

I am. I am alot of things. Randi, Baby, Mommy, I don't feel like a daughter, or a sister to be honest. I think of my family..and I only see Kate and Sky and the new baby.. Is that a bad thing? I would possibly consider the rest of my immediate "family" my family but I don't have much interaction with them. Colleen is in South Dakota with her whole family, Brian lives in this same haus with us..but he doesn't feel related. They are more, if I'm in trouble, or hurt or something..they step in..but other than that they are in idle.. Eh.. lol I do have a brother..but I don't know Kyle, he doesn't know me and I don't think that will ever change.


That has been on my mind. Just because I think of the future of my family and I couldn't imagine having that gap between my children and I.. I would never want to move states away while they were growing up, or just go to work, come home and watch television all day.. There would be so much missed time and moments that define someone. I can't think about ever doing that..and I don't see how they could. I think I was the product of two people who weren't ready to be parents. But I love me and I wouldn't change a thing :)


I'm most likely going to enroll in Kaplain College for IT. I miss the Art Institute of Indianapolis..but I can't afford it. I love that school and I will go back to it when I can afford it again. I'm happy that James is still going. I am proud of you sir! I stay out of trouble and stay on the right path when I am keeping busy. Idle hands get me in trouble or mixed up with the wrong crowd if you know what I mean. I have no room for mistakes. Being 25 and having a 14 month old and another baby on the way, plus taking care of my fiance' and finances..doesn't leave me with time to mess up. Their lives depend on me. I strive to be successful in life and I'm glad I have importunity in life. I work 3 jobs technically, but my demo job at ASM is completely random.. I was working 4 day weeks then all of a sudden for the last 3 weeks...nothing. I work part time at Vermillion place for minimun wage, and that is my biggest check. Ugh. I also have my job at Treasure Point, but I have no set schedule and no guarantee on hours..but its still something. I hope things will pan out and more income will start flowing. 


Well on a lighter note, I have restarted doing my yoga practice and meditation. I have been doing it for 4 out of 5 days. I missed one day because I worked all day and got tired. It relieves my stress and makes me feel great, plus it gives a spark to me and Kate ;) hehe. Times have been great! I am trying to prevent any complications with this pregnancy this time around. I am not going to die. Well I think this is a great first blog..so thanks for reading. I love you Kate, Sky and New Baby. We will get to see what you are tomorrow :)